One Year Later

Disclaimer: I’m in a bit of a sober mood tonight so this may tend to be a bit more mushy then the last few post, then again maybe not.

A year ago tonight Erika suffered her subarachnoid brain hemorrhage. Today a lot of those memories came rushing back of how helpless I felt in that I could do nothing for her, but pray. The Lord answered all our prayers despite the slim statistical chance that she would survive without deficits. At one point I was told that I may have to re teach her from kindergarten forward. Well not only did she survive without deficits she finished medical school with her class and is now in her first grueling year of residency. That experience increased my faith like nothing before and I know it did the same for a lot of you.

The picture in this post has special meaning for me that only a couple of you know about. While Erika was in neuro intensive care (NICU), I sat beside her bed late one night and prayed that I could see her graduate and take a picture holding her. I think a lot of folks thought I was crazy when I picked her up for the photo, but it was an answer to prayer. There is power when we pray!

How is Erika? Well in a nut shell she is the same girl I married 16.5 years ago. The only thing is… I think she is a whole lot prettier these days. Maybe it’s the high pressure in my eyes, but I really do. She of course is still a whole lot smarter than me, but she could have lost half her brain and still been that. Tonight when she went to bed I could hear her playing Kari Job’s song “Healer.” The song she asked me to turn on each night for her when I left the hospital.

So now a year later it’s my turn. I was reminded again today that lymphoma has not been ruled out of the picture yet. Things seem to be going at an amazingly slow pace. Sometimes I feel like the rest of the world is walking on a moving sidewalk while I am walking along side. My simple way of thinking is that after five weeks maybe we would have something ruled out or in. The”house” doctor is starting to stir the pot so I figure the biopsy is just around the corner. Supposedly the procedure of choice is now going to be a mediastinoscopy. (A new Google word) From what I gather, they make a cut in the neck above the collar bone and slide a looking glass with a small set of pliers down to the lymph node. They squeeze off a piece of the node and pull everything out. At least I hope they remember to pull everything out. Can you imagine trying to get through airport security with a pair of pliers in your chest? Ah sir we said to empty your pockets of everything. What part of “EVERYTHING” didn’t you understand???????

Well I did it. I started building the wood ribs for an airplane in the spare room in the apartment. Yes a real to life two person airplane. After figuring how much a PhD would cost me, I decided that I am going to do my own PhD in the form of an airplane built from scratch.

By the way, this project is going to take years and years. I’ve prayed that I can get a picture standing in front of it when it is finished.